Previously preoccupied with the thought of the prospect of
flying tomorrow to Boston for a business trip, I am grateful to have received
an invitation to visit a friend in Maine first. (Actually, I invited myself ). So I sit on American Airlines flight 3987
flying through Philly and onto Portland.
I reflect, still in awe over September 11, 2001. Fifteen years later, the wounds are still so
raw requiring larger doses of hydrogen peroxide and antibiotics the minute
Labor Day festivities end. I feel it lurking. The fall weather, the sunrises, the sunsets
and even the play lists on the radio trigger feelings that I compartmentalize
most of the year. Literally, I brace myself
for the impact of what is truly indescribable.
Occasionally in my travels, I am asked where I am from. My answer - “New York” - tends to create a
knee jerk response, “Were you there on “that” day?” Each time, I am reluctant
as I repeat my story because I feel as if I am reliving it all over again. Even 15 years later, I try to comprehend the
magnitude of what happened to our Country, and me, my ex-husband, our Wall
Street friends, a boss who lost his dad, a client who lost her twin brother, and
the experiences of so many close friends and acquaintances.
You see, I never know how it is going to hit me. I’ve said this before, but three hundred and
sixty-four days of the year, I quietly mourn and optimistically think that
“this year’s anniversary will be different”!
Fifteen years later, my optimism quarrels with my sadness, anger, and dismay
over it all. I question which direction
I am going to take it this year when somebody asks me about that dreaded day.
We can never erase that day and the effect those events have
had on our lives. Millions of Americans
went to bed 15 years ago oblivious to how the next day was going to
unfold. Our days following that horrific
day are no different than September 10th, 2001 - so live life to the
fullest with love, kindness and gratitude in your hearts. We will never be the same but we are required
to move onward – so we do…in an altered state but we never forget.
